A wolf appears with a bird in its mouth
Blue feathers, my fate, the beautiful white throat

She'd never felt a pain like this before. Battles with brutes had long left her war-torn and waning, gasping for breath at the climax of each battle and bleeding from places she'd dared never let anyone reach. And yet, Avaneira laid strewn across her den, unable to quite catch her breath, unable to quite get to her paws. The battle for the Brook had left her both physically and emotionally devastated, and the Wolf Queen could not be there for her kingdom as it all seemed to fall apart around her. As she watched it slip through her pale little fingers.

You were always just a little girl, Avaneira. Your eyes were too big for your belly.

The weight of it welled in her chest, the pain and hurt she'd experience each night as she desperately tried to press her head into Karim's chest and will the pain away. Parvati had done all they could to maintain her wounds, and Avaneira wished nothing more desperately than to have Lochlan return and help their lone medic, to relieve them in those frigid nights of tending to a Queen left half-dead. Mournfully, she called for @Morrigan, alone now in her den, frigid cold even as she lay nested against furs and feathers. Shivering, pained.

If Morrigan could have taken on both fights at once she would have and though the darker Greyflood knew that if Ava had been ambushed Morrigan would have been just as likely to throw herself into the fray. Yet the gods had smiled on Morrigan’s victory whilst dealing her sister another blow. Instead, it was all she could do to try and hold the pieces of her life and loved ones together these last months.

It should have broken her, yet it had not. At least not yet. Morrigan was trying not to hover around @Avaneira after successfully getting her home, knowing her worries would only get in the way of healing, but she had been pestering those who would tell her the truth and when Ava called for her sister she was maybe just a little too conveniently nearby. As she entered Ava’s den, her heart clenched in her chest at her state but she did her best to control her expression and managed… for the most part.

“Oh, Ava,” she said moving to crouch down next to her sister but fearing to touch her lest it cause her more pain.

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A wolf appears with a bird in its mouth
Blue feathers, my fate, the beautiful white throat

Oh, Ava. @Morrigan's words haunted her. It should not have been her place to say it; the mounrfulness and agony in her sister's tone caused Ava to flinch, to shy away against the edge of the den, to reduce herself back to the shivering girl she'd been all her life until she'd challenged for the Cove. For a brief glimmer in history she'd thought she'd made something of herself. She thought she'd succeeded in the ways her mother had begged of her, had lived to see Morrigan be proud of her. And yet all it had taken was one calculated blow to fell her, to destroy and unravel the threads of the wolf who'd perhaps never quite be what she'd been intended for.

“Don't,” she breathed, ragged and hoarse, as if she'd not spoken a word for days. Tears welled in the corners of her eyes, allowing her this final surrender of grief as they stood there alone. “I can't do it anymore.” She breathed, then turned her rosy gaze to meet the mismatched one of her sister, “I can't do this anymore.” For so long had she loved and lost, saw kingdoms felled and worried when hers would be the next. Saw her friends and lovers die and selfishly continue to find more attachments, knowing she brought death and destruction with her.

And now she was being far more selfish shoving this all onto Morrigan. To let her sister deal with the aftermath of her mistakes.

As Morrigan crouched there next to her sister and lifelong best friend there was no trace of judgment in her gaze, only worry and the same pride that would always be there. In Morrigan’s eyes it was merely a matter of fate. If their opponents had been different then perhaps if would be Morrigan now struck down by war. She wished desperately that it was, yet as @Avaneira spoke there was an extra heaviness added, as the barbarian realized fully what she was saying.

She was quiet for a long moment, knowing that it would be so easy for both of them to just walk away together. Yet Avaneira had built something beautiful and to let it crumble into someone else’s hands now? She wouldn’t do that to Ava or her allies either. So after a deep inhale Morrigan simply said, “Then don’t… After all, what else am I here for?” Though she tried to keep her tone lighthearted there was a somber lilt to her offer. What would Talisa think if this was what Ava was saying? Would it be okay now?

code by javs

A wolf appears with a bird in its mouth
Blue feathers, my fate, the beautiful white throat

She was undeserving of Morrigan's unconditional love. She had wrenched her from the Hollow and thrust her into a life she might not have asked for. But Avaneira would never take her for granted; she owed her sister a great deal for smoothing things over with Magnus and paving the way for Ava to make her own alliance with him on top of Morrigan's, and her given her the capability of seeing into the native's lifestyle through her marriage to Talisa and the extended family she had unveiled as a result. She couldn't have asked for anything more, even through all the heartache and pain.

“I feel like I've failed you, failed Caladan,” she began again, letting her head rest between her paws. The pain from raising her head for so long had begun to cause a dull, throbbing headache. She was tired. She wanted to sleep. “It should always have been you.” Undoubtedly, @Morrigan should have always been the leader. Avaneira had always reveled in her shadow, the fearful sister content to watch from between the trees as her counterpart waged war against any who dared to threaten them. Perhaps it was this twist of fate that caused such ethereal transgressions. Perhaps now things would fall perfectly into place. Perhaps this were some sort of strange god telling her it was time.

It was time. Those words brought such strange finality, yet such a blissful peace.

The worst of it all was @Avaneira’s own thoughts on the matter and Morrigan couldn’t help but disagree with vehemence. “Ava, no. Never. You have never once done anything less than inspire me.” As for the rest, Morrigan had plenty of time to think about the consequences of her sister’s rash actions and even had a moment to speak of it with Magnus himself. They had both agreed that what Ava did ended up making them all stronger and closer in the end. “it had to be you. You think I would have ever bothered to leave the Hollows if you hadn’t paved the way? I would have been content in stagnation. You’re the brave one, Ava. I’m just… reactive.” She shrugged her shoulders passively but her own tears no longer could be held at bay. They were all things Morrigan had wished she’d found the time to tell Ava sooner, before it had been a necessity.

code by javs

A wolf appears with a bird in its mouth
Blue feathers, my fate, the beautiful white throat

Morrigan's words stayed Ava's racing heart, allowed her to feel an unexpected warmth where once there'd only been self-doubt and regret. It had been far too long since she'd heard such reassurances, far too swept up in needing to please others, to be on the sidelines of war she never should've gotten involved in. Near strangers now existed in places where once there'd been family and friends, and even the Cove seemed far emptier and far more despondent than ever. Only the bright faces of her children and Morrigan, and those they had kept close and loved seemed to break through the veil of darkness. Petra, Reyna, Parvati, Keir, Sanson...

“Thank you...” she sighed, allowing her head to press against Morrigan's shoulder and hoping she wasn't pressing too hard into her still-wounded sibling. Would she have really stayed in the Hollow all this time? Would she really not have found the desire to take a place of her own? Magnus' kingdom was certainly not without its rewards; and Morrigan was capable of greater things even if Avaneira had not won this opportunity. Now, it felt as if she'd have brand new territory to step into. A new chance at something magnificent.

“It's your turn, now,” she said finally, letting her half-closed eyes open under fluttering lashes, “No more stagnation.” Whatever @Morrigan decided to do with the Cove, Avaneira would be there to support her, even if she'd be fettered to the sidelines to do it.

Morrigan’s shoulder was still tender but compared to what her sister must be feeling now it was no bother at all to feel her touch. Rather a reassurance that she had taken Morrigan’s words at least a little to heart. When @Avaneira said it was her turn now she let out a breath, “I’ll pretend that doesn’t make me nervous if it helps,” she told the pale woman as she leaned into her touch, “But let those be my worries now, and take some time for you. I just wish I could help you more,” she finished lamely, remembering her own lack of healing skill once more and how she’d been entirely reliant on others when her loved ones were in danger from something other than an enemy. Her tears had cut tracks into the white of her cheeks now but she was controlling them better as she put in her own version of a brave face.

code by javs

A wolf appears with a bird in its mouth
Blue feathers, my fate, the beautiful white throat

She felt frail; weakened, grieving. Mourning something that never felt truly hers. Avaneira felt no regret in handing the pride to her sister, knew that if anyone could morph it into greatness, that it would be @Morrigan. A gentle sigh slipped from her lips and following it, a small smile. A final reprieve between the overwhelming exhaustion that now creeped up her limp legs. She could barely manage staying awake now, falling half-asleep in the blissful silence, listening to the dull sound of waves crashing outside of her den. It was a sound Ava never thought she'd grow to love. It was a sound she now struggled to consider living without.

“You're doing more than enough,” she finally said, feeling herself slip into a deeper semi-consciousness, “You're everything I could have asked for in a sister.” She had so many things to say, so many thoughts and feelings she wanted to convey, to weep out into the open and spend time processing with someone she trusted so dearly. But as it were, Avaneira was far too tired and far too ill, and would need to spend the next coming weeks deep in her den and away from the waking, curious world.

exit Avaneira

The fatigue seems to be creeping it’s dark shadow back over her badly wounded sibling and Morrigan had no doubt that this emotional scene would have been even more so exhausting. She felt a bit winded herself but her mind was too abuzz with thought that she knew she could not truly hope to rest properly soon. “Thank you, Ava. You, too.” her voice was stiff only from the effort of not becoming choked up again, “Get some sleep. I’ll watch over you.” And the Cove… she added silently, feeling the full weight of High Sovereign now settled onto broad shoulders. Heavy is the head indeed… As Ava slipped into sleep Morrigan remained where she was, listening to the sound of the waves as the sky darkened over the Cove. She would remain until someone else came to watch over the pale Greyflood. exit Morrigan

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