the baroness is tending to the garden she's started outside her den today. with deft paws, she does her best to encourage her plants to grow. it'll be good to have them on hand to keep herself stocked up, if she can get them to take root. it's not a very extensive garden, but it has good herbs for childbirth and wounds both, and as the resident nursemaid and medic combo... she's glad to have the supplies. hopefully they grow quickly, and then she and echo can both make use of this garden instead of having to run all over the island looking for herbs.

@Asteria

STARLING DRACONIA

We'll ride the waves of the ocean // Wasting all of our days // We could roll with the motion // It could all float away // All these feels in the open // Reasons I've been afraid // Knowing I won't drown if I keep my head afloat // I'ma keep my head afloat

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Everything had changed.

The shadowy cub was growing, of course, but that was not all. Somehow she had managed to find a home in the lagoon, and had brought a friend along. Even if she was not at all sure where she and Nero stood at least she had managed to do something good for him.

Asteria was a bit of a jumble of emotion, though, and had set out to explore this new place. Lost in thought as she was she did not notice the other until she had nearly walked right in to her. A small “Oof” slipped from her lips as she ground to a sudden stop and took a moment to take in the actions of the other.

After a moment she asked (and not in the most polite way, truthfully) “why are you playing with those plants?”

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the small noise behind her has her turning to look at @Asteria, and the child's words bring a warm laugh from starling's lips. i'm trying to grow a garden, she explains gently, gesturing with a paw at the usnea she'd rehomed here. i'm a medic, and a nursemaid. i need to keep stocked so that i can help whenever someone gets hurt. or gives birth, but she's not sure she needs to talk about birthing with a child. there's nothing wrong with it, of course, but she's not sure if it's necessarily appropriate subject matter for what appears to be asteria's age range. i'm starling, she introduces herself softly, smiling. what's your name?

STARLING DRACONIA

We'll ride the waves of the ocean // Wasting all of our days // We could roll with the motion // It could all float away // All these feels in the open // Reasons I've been afraid // Knowing I won't drown if I keep my head afloat // I'ma keep my head afloat

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The laughter made her ears press against her head, feeling foolish for asking the question at all. A frown furrowed her brow though she managed to hold her tongue and tamp down the outburst that threatened to rise.

Asteria,” she muttered rather grumpily, though despite her sullen mood she was intrigued by what the female had said. Not, perhaps, for the best reasons though. “Don’t you find it boring? I’d much rather be the one fighting.” The young girl already knew she wanted to be like her mother - a brave fighter - and also knew that she just had to get her damned emotions under control.

A sudden thought occurred to her and she asked, then - “D’you have anything in there to make emotions go away?” maybe all she needed was a special plant!

@Starling

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She doesn't intend to make @Asteria feel bad; it's just that the question reminds her of when her children were small, toddling after her and asking questions about her work. Asteria's words, however, aren't quite the same ones her own daughters had used. My talents don't lie in that direction, sadly, but healers are every bit as important as fighters. After all, without medics, how would the fighters recover from their wounds? Besides, she finds her work calming rather than boring. Asteria's next question is somewhat alarming, but Starling takes a moment to consider it before answering. I don't, but... might I ask why you're wanting to get rid of your emotions? It's a concerning idea, for sure, but perhaps Asteria is simply feeling overwhelmed?

STARLING DRACONIA

We'll ride the waves of the ocean // Wasting all of our days // We could roll with the motion // It could all float away // All these feels in the open // Reasons I've been afraid // Knowing I won't drown if I keep my head afloat // I'ma keep my head afloat

code by corvus

 

Healers were as important as fighters.

Some part of her had always known this even if she had never given it much thought. Asteria had not met many healers - though she wondered if Faevrye was one, with how she had helped in that moment of panic.

That memory stirred a frown, again, and she latched on to the answer to her question. “I want them to go away.” a childish answer, naive and chock full of the very emotions she wished to be rid of.

“They make me feel weak.” Asteria wanted to be in control. She wanted to be strong and brave. She did not want to fight the damned black wave every time something went sideways.

@Starling

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I want them to go away, says @Asteria, and Starling contemplates this. The child's next words put it more into focus, and Starling settles to her haunches, offering a gentle smile. Without emotion, you could not experience love, or joy, or any of the things that make life worth living. Without happiness and love, what is there to life? Still, she can understand how the negative emotions might make someone feel weak, and so she aims to put that notion to rest - at least a little. Having emotions doesn't make you weak. You're still young; you just need to learn self control. Feeling a certain way doesn't mean you have to act on it, after all, and keeping yourself tempered will only make you stronger in the end.

She's never been a fan of the whole "pain and suffering builds character" model, but... she has to admit that spending the last five [5] years of her life locked in her own mind has certainly given her a new perspective on certain things. How can you become a stronger person if you don't face fear and uncertainty? Life tests you to see what you're made of. Starling herself has been through much, but she likes to think she's kept a positive attitude and sweet disposition despite it. Then again, she'd never been all that disposed to immense anger to begin with, or bitterness. You can't be brave if you don't experience fear. You cannot be kind if you've never experienced anger. You cannot know happiness if you never experience sadness. The difficult things are what make the good and easy things precious.

Life is the metal that binds the coin of good and evil together; one cannot exist without the other, just like light and dark. It's a lesson that Starling hopes Asteria can learn now, rather than taking years to realize it the way some individuals do. No one likes hardship, or feeling as if their emotions are too powerful to control, but these things are necessary for good to exist. They're necessary in order for people to grow and develop and become better than they were the day before. It gets better with time, the Draconia murmurs, although this isn't true of everything. Certainly, Asteria's emotions may always be powerful, but perhaps she will get better at being the one in control as she ages.

STARLING DRACONIA

We'll ride the waves of the ocean // Wasting all of our days // We could roll with the motion // It could all float away // All these feels in the open // Reasons I've been afraid // Knowing I won't drown if I keep my head afloat // I'ma keep my head afloat

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The frown did not fade, even as @Starling was nice enough to try to talk her through how she was feeling. She shook her head, as if to disagree, and could not hold her tongue completely. "I just don't want to be SAD." Didn't she understand? "When I feel sad or get frustrated it feels like I'm drowning. Like I can't breath. I don't like it!" Her voice, now, was frustrated, and she could feel the urge to cry come springing to life.

Asteria closed her eyes and took a deep breath as she listened to the many comparisons that Starling gave. But none of that mattered - none of that helped right now. No matter how perfect the words were there was simply no getting through the stubbornness she was showing. Asteria knew what she needed - she needed to be able to turn off the emotions.

Control, was the word, but she was too young and hot-tempered to grasp that word.

The last thing, though, caught her attention. "Does it get better? How can I make it get better faster?" Asteria didn't want to feel this way again!

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I just don't want to be SAD, says the girl, and Starling's heart stutters, the sweet smile on her face faltering a little. I understand that, she murmurs, and she does understand. The ache in her chest never seems to cease these days, torn between finding Melava and Witcheri and returning home to see her children again. The ones that are still alive, at least. @Asteria's question drags the dragoness out of her reverie, and she offers the girl a soft look. I'm not sure there is a way to make it go faster. I still struggle with being sad myself, but... it isn't as overwhelming as it used to be. I think it just takes time. She's sorry she can't be more help to the girl, but - reincarnate or not - Starling has never claimed to have all the answers.

STARLING DRACONIA

We'll ride the waves of the ocean // Wasting all of our days // We could roll with the motion // It could all float away // All these feels in the open // Reasons I've been afraid // Knowing I won't drown if I keep my head afloat // I'ma keep my head afloat

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It clearly wasn't the answer that she wanted. Nor did she think she had really explained how she felt, but it seemed a moot point anyway. By all appearances there wasn't anything that could help, and Asteria was going to have to learn the hard way. Practice.

A frown creased her brow, though, and she flopped down with a little "hmph." Realizing she was probably being a little bit rude, she did her best to carry on the conversation. "Growin' up takes forever." Scintillating conversation, that.

@Starling

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