(ooc: I know some of you already have 'after the flood' threads, so there is no obligation for anyone tagged to show up in here. Just wanted to have something with Roan searching the Mire.)

The floods had finally receded enough to go back. Though the lands haunted the mauve lion at every turn, Roan persisted anyway. He had to know that he at least tried to find the rest of them. "@Taj! @Jamil!" The masked lion's voice shouted across the eerily quiet Mire. Days ago, this was a home. Muck and all, Roan had found comfort in it. Now, it was just a reminder of everything else they had lost. "@Cressida! @Fenrir!" Every name was shouted loud and clear, waiting just a moment after to hope he might hear something in return. "Anyone! Can anyone hear me?!" Roan picked his way carefully through Ecrosia, making sure the footing was safe in case @Faelyn was still following him. He'd keep searching for however long it took to find someone or at least to find some answers.

Table & Reference by Amanda | Lineart by WolvesWoodGlenAdopts | Background from unsplash

She picked her way through the mire after Roan, listening intently for any sounds of others. So many had been lost, but there was still hope for those who were missing. Please, let him find them, she begged whoever might be listening, because she didn't know what gods or goddesses or spirits should be prayed to for such a thing, or even how to pray.

Though she was careful to follow in his pawsteps as best she could, Faelyn still kept her gaze fixed on the sides of the trail they were taking, looking for the signs of others being there. The one thing the water had made simple was seeing who had been in an area recently.

He called and called, but no one answered. The only sounds of life were the sounds of footsteps behind him as @Faelyn followed. "Jamil! Cressida!" Again, he called for his cousin and apprentice, hoping that he'd see their pink coats pop up somewhere within the Mire. Everyone he called for, they should be so easy to see, right? Their bright coats; pink, mauve, gold. They should stand out fairly well against the dark palette of Ecrosia. "Fenrir!" Even if he had not exactly gotten along with the yearling once they figured out who each other really was, he still didn't want to think that the floods had swallowed him just as they had done to Kiton. "Taj!" By the time Roan called out his nephew's name again, his voice was choking with emotion, realizing that no one was here but him and Faelyn. Not even the birds sang above them nor did the frogs croak around them. Nothing but the sounds of their own footfall and breathing, and each desperate call for a missing member.

Eventually, Roan just stopped calling. He stopped walking. Sure, the watered down Mire showed signs of recent visitors, but the scents did not bring him to any of his family. Just curious minds wanting to seize the opportunity to investigate a prideland without the threat of an actual pride being around. The mauve lion's head hung low as he sat in the muck for a moment, tears threatening to prick at his eyes with this overwhelming feeling of helplessness. He should have done more to find them when the flood first started and not just run and hope they all followed. His warning calls had not been quick enough. And now? What if all of them were dead?

Table & Reference by Amanda | Lineart by WolvesWoodGlenAdopts | Background from unsplash

She kept her ears peeled for any sounds of response as they walked. hoping desperately to hear someone call out to them. Surely there was someone? They knew some of those who were dead, but she refused to believe that the rest of those missing were also dead.

She lifted her head, sucking in a breath as she did so, and loosed a roar that echoed through the swamp. She so rarely lifted her voice, it felt so odd to do so. But, anything that might make them hear...

When Roan fell silent shortly after, though, even she had to admit things looked bleak.

Faelyn moved to press her side against his, tucking her head against his neck. "I'm so sorry," she whispered. They could still hope they were out there somewhere, but so many lives had been lost to mourn as well.

@Roan

It should have warmed his heart to hear @Faelyn's voice join his own as they called for those who were missing, but with utter silence being their only response, it only made the mauve male sink further into his grief. Even when the pale woman came to his side, giving him her warmth as Fae pressed up against him, Roan could hardly feel any joy in the closeness. He wouldn't allow himself that luxury, but for how long would he continue to punish himself for something he could not have controlled in the first place? Who knows, but the masked lion was certainly good at it after all these years.

I'm so sorry, came the whispered condolence. It was something he had heard now several times from anyone he had had to mention his brother to, and would come so many more times with every mention of the Mire. The Hodari curse was upon in full force. Roan felt his jaw tighten even as Fae dipped her head beneath his. "I can't keep doing this," the mauve lion muttered into the hollow air. The specifics of what 'this' was, however, were left to interpretation as emotion threatened to choke any further words.

Table & Reference by Amanda | Lineart by WolvesWoodGlenAdopts | Background from unsplash

His murmur broke her heart. She wished she knew what to say or do to make things better, but she also suspected there was nothing to be done. He'd lost his brother, his home, so much. How many times could one be expected to come back from that? While she was selfishly thankful that he was still alive, she knew that he was suffering and she felt doubly guilty.

She remembered suddenly how the lion Kiton had won the pride from had said the lands were cursed, and now she believed it. What other reason could there be for these things happening? "I wish I knew what to do," she said, speaking both of that in particular and in general. Surely there had to be something.

@Roan

I wish I knew what to do. So did he, Fae. So did he. Did anyone even know what to do anymore? Roan felt like he was just drifting through life at this point, waiting for someone else to take them in and clean up their messes. Where did they go from here? Though the mauve lion knew that the majority of the Hodari were going to the Brook as their obvious answer to that question, he, on the other paw, wasn't so certain that it would fix anything. It was just another temporary fix to their continuous turmoil. What if Vermeda fell next because they were there? It wasn't just the lands that were cursed anymore. It was the entire Hodari family.

As they both stood there in the silence of the abandoned Mire, Roan couldn't help his mind from wandering down a dark path. Where else was it supposed to go anymore these days? The silence had wore on long enough again between spoken words as the mauve lion just sat and stared ahead with @Faelyn at his side. "Why do you stay with us, Fae? Why have you stayed with me all this time? After all we've been through?" The questions sounded hollow and ghostly in the vacant air. Questions that Roan knew he shouldn't even ask lest he risk her coming to her senses and realizing how dangerous was truly was to be around him and his family. Why had she stuck around them after everything? Didn't she realize how much safer and calmer her life could have been without him? But maybe this was the last straw. The last bit of sense he had left to give. If he couldn't lose anymore loved ones, he might just have to push them away himself before they had a chance to perish like the rest of them.

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She was silent as he didn't respond, because she honestly couldn't think of anything useful to say. She wished she could, but alas. This wasn't her realm of expertise, and there hadn't been anyone around to console her when she'd lost her family so she didn't have anything to go by.

When he finally spoke, the question wasn't what she was expecting. Why did she stay? Wasn't that obvious? Then she thought about it and realized that he probably felt the same way she had up on the cliffs right after the flooding. He probably felt like he was a curse.

"Because your family has always been kind to me, and there for me, since I joined the mountains," she said honestly. "And because I care for you. A lot actually. I can't imagine being without you," she said. Maybe it was too bold, and she worried about that as soon as she had said it, but if there was ever a time for being bold it was now.

@Roan

He wished she had given a different answer, or not had an answer to give at all. Anything that could have given him a good reason to let her go or push her away entirely. Just anything that would save @Faelyn anymore hurt or loss because of him or his family. But she didn't give him that opportunity, and Roan couldn't bring himself to push her away, as much as he wanted to, if only for her own safety. Fae said all the right things, all the perfect answers, and yet the masked man didn't know what to do with it. He had always struggled to put his feelings into words, if he was even able to recognize his own feelings from the start. Everyone else could see it, so why couldn't they?

"I... I care for you, too, Fae.... A lot." The mauve lion began to sheepishly admit the same back to her, but how could he say more than that? He knew he wanted to, but could never find the right thing to say. "And I... I don't ever want to imagine being without you." But what if he had to? Roan pulled himself away from her then, tearing his gaze out of view from Fae's as well as he turned his body away. "But I also can't ask you to stay. I can't keep putting you in harms way like this. Ecrosia was what?... The fourth home you lost because of me?" He'd ask the question without looking at her because he knew if he did, he would crumble into what the mauve lion really wanted to say, but knew he shouldn't. Faelyn deserved better than what he had dragged her through over the years. "You don't have to stay, if you don't want to. You have an out." The Hodari's voice fell eerily low at that point, head hanging beneath the words. He might as well push her away now before he'd lose her in the end just like everyone else. At least if they parted now, he could imagine she might be safe somewhere else.

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Her heart broke for him and his misery. She couldn't blame him for blaming himself, little as she wanted him to do that. She'd done the exact same thing before. "None of it was your fault. You can't control the weather," she said. If any of them could control the weather none of the disasters that had sent them from the mountains and the mire would have happened.

When he continued she walked around him in an attempt to plant herself in front of him again. "I don't want an out. I'm not going anywhere," she said steadfastly. She had no desire to go anywhere else, regardless of what he said. Well, unless he said that he hated her and wanted her to leave, but she'd find that hard to believe in this particular situation. "We're in this together."

@Roan