He was still covered in her blood. Staggering away from the challenge after both fights, wounds fresh and stinging. He didn't know if there was more of his blood on him, or that of Levana's or Rainhart's. There was a numbing pain in his chest, knowing that his soul was inside screaming. So careless he'd been. What was to come would not be pleasant, but Alexander wouldn't, no...couldn't think of that right now.

Shame coursed through his veins as he stepped into the waters of the watering hole. Blue eyes watched as it was slowly tainted by the color of blood, drifting off his form with each small stroke of water. The moonlight overhead reflect against the surface of the water, making it look almost black. Deeper he steps, inhaling until his lungs felt they might explode - holding it; enduring, doing his best to focus on not feeling all of this.

Pain.

It is a warm summer night, and it drew the belle from fruitless attempts at rest. Tansy roams the plains on quiet, absent paths. She wasn’t really hunting, nor really looking for herbs. But she wouldn’t turn a blind eye to either should her aimless route bring her ‘cross them.

But it is neither she finds, as she passes the watering hole. There is a figure within it’s shallows - once that is unmistakably familiar by shape, even in the shadows of the night. There was no mistaking that big pale mane.

Tansy descends the sandy slope toward him with a friendly chuff upon her lips- til the wind brings the scent of fresh wounds and her tawny features pinch in concern.

“Oh my-” she sucks in a breath and hurries forth to the water’s edge. “Alexander? What happened to you?”

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He wasn't expecting her. Of all those who could stumble upon him - it would certainly not be @Tansy. His breath catches in his throat at the sound of her voice. Soft, lilting - concerned. Blue eyes cast up, brows furrowing softly as glances over his shoulder at the maned lioness.

"I..." Finding himself speechless, he simply stares down at the blood on his paws, knowing that it coated his face as well. There was a certain numbness in his body, his features - it was clear that most of this blood was not his. "I hurt others, they hurt me..." The beast admits, expecting her to run, to step back and never speak to him again.

In this moment he remembered all the horrific things he'd done during the war. All the things he knew he'd do again if it came down to it.

Tansy can see it now; the blood drifting in the inky water. The moonlight plays on it in pale, silvered stains of pink. Now she can see how bloodied his coat was, pale furs darker than usual. Tansy's lips thin into a grim line as she surveys it all.

"Are you... alright?" she utters, doubt carrying upon her tawny, freckled face. "It's a lot of blood. I can..." now she weighs up how much she can do, if he was badly wounded. The idea of stepping any closer made her chest tighten. It had been some time since she'd attended to anyone's injuries. She'd offered herbs to weary travellers, to those with scuffed paws and snagged claws of long journeys. It is frustrating to feel like, even as she stands knowing how to, that she doubts she can struggle past these hesitations to help. She could nearly hear gran tutting over her shoulder, at her foolishness.

"I can help." Tansy bolsters herself. "Try clean what you can, with the water." He had that idea right, if anything. With the gore washed clear, she expected then she could get a clearer inspection.

@Alexander ♔

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Alexander doesn't move. He feels frozen in place as the memories sweep into his mind like a movie playing on repeat. There had been so much blood, so many screams and cries - fire consuming a field of battle where bodies collided viciously. Gasping, he squares his limbs as they shake within the water, causing wild ripples to expand outwards. @Tansy asks if he's alright and he finds himself unable to respond.

Blue eyes are open wide, pupils tiny dots within the vast color. It wasn't until she speaks again, I can help, that the beast finally inhales deeply. Body is still tense, but it eases up some, the sting of the cuts and bites on his flesh coming to life to remind him he was here - on this plane of existence. She mentions him cleaning the wounds with the water, he laughs softly, more hysterical than he meant for it to sound. "I...cannot move." His body felt foreign to him, and his muscles, his legs - none of it wanted to comply.

Tansy treads on careful paws, closer to the water’s edge til it lapped upon her pads. Even in that low light, she could see a rigidity in @Alexander ♔ ’s form and it takes her several scanning seconds to figure out even below those bloody stains on his pelt there is a feeling she far more starkly recognises. It is fear.

Sympathy, empathy, flood the nymph’s breast as she sees that familiar tremble of his body, the ripples faint but so clear to her. She knows what that feels like, how it snared away one’s very breath. How it choked and stilled and trapped.

“Oh you poor thing.” she tuts, voice gentle. It is hard to muscle down her own hesitations as she stoops to gather a bundle of young reeds in her jaws, tugging them free from the mud. Her long tangled mane meets the water as she sloshes toward him, stooping to wet and clean the grassy bundle as she approaches him; delicately. Her voice is muffled by the bundle. “I am coming closer, alright?” Assurance more for herself, that him. But she wanted to keep him talking, distracted.

“I can help you clean it away,” she informs softly, barely a step away now. “That way I’ll know what treatment you might be needin.” Still, Tansy pauses. She did not know him well enough to assume anything. “May I?”

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She sounds distant, far away. There is, however, comfort in the sound of her voice. The tone, the way it drifted to him like a lullaby. Brows knit together softly, his features drawing in as he hesitantly turns to look over his shoulder.

For a split second, behind her he sees chaos and carnage - a mixing of memories and realities that he finds hard to wash away. Inhaling deeply, the beast attempts to calm himself, his mind a rampant disarray. Part of him was afraid to let @Tansy near. The darkness in him had not been released in such a long time, yet it had reared it's ugly head when his jaws had latched onto Levana.

"Be careful." He whispers, a warning - or her own sake. Alexander did not trust himself right now, but he did his best to remain still, frozen. Every inch closer causes the thick muscle beneath his crimson coat to tighten, those blue eyes watching her with dilated pupils. The length of his tail finally moves, just barely, curling toward her in the water - as if seeking out a reminder of where and when he was. "Yes..." Once more his voice is hoarse and low, but clear.

Be careful Tansy hears him mutter on hushed tone. It is quite unlike the him she was already acquainted with, robbed of his power by the panic she reads on his previously confident, well-controlled form. She didn’t need to be told twice; Tansy had no intention of being this close longer than her duty required. Her pelt crawled with the discomfort of proximity.

She briefly met his eyes with her own teal, sees the thin of his pupils and it makes her pause, clutching the reeds carefully. Warily. Before it all, she would have not ever thought twice about helping another. But she hesitates all the same now, because she was not the doe-eyed thing of years ago.

"If anythin hurts bad," she warns, "You must tell me." With the soggy reeds she now reaches out to begin clearing the blood from his coat. She never once let even their fur brush, delicate and purposeful with the swabs of the reed. She dips her head to rinse it once in the pool, watching from behind lashes and knotted bangs that fall over her features in a moment of private contemplation.

@Alexander ♔

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She listens and he is grateful. It feels, lately, more often than not he is not within his right mind. He couldn't trust himself not to lash out in anger. Though, Alexander was heavily misguided on how his own rage worked. The beast assumed it could be directed at anyone, but deep in his soul he knew he'd never hurt @Tansy.

As the reed begins to brush along his form, the Savante gently winces, his muscles flinching slightly with each stroke. It felt as if his nerves were exposed, the trickles of water cascading down his bloodied form coming alive against his skin. Inhaling deep through his nose, nostrils flare and he takes a moment to simply dip his entire face into the water - the heat and anger coursing through his veins finally subsiding.

He's beneath the surface for almost too long before he comes back up for air. Panting softly, water dripping from his jaws and his face, he didn't realize he was becoming cleaner and cleaner, with her dutiful washing. "I am...I can breathe now." He exhales slowly, feeling his lungs relax a bit more, his muscles unlocked and his body swayed somewhat.

"Thank you..." The beast murmurs softly, barely audible.

Tansy finishes her rinsing, lifts her head to continue her careful cleaning. Water drip-dripped from grasses and her mane alike, and she was glad the light low for even in the silver moon's gaze she was certain her limbs were soon awash with pink from the cleansed blood. It was no mountain spring, and she was concerned for the cleanliness, but water would do better than air to any superficial cuts. She did not want to miss any and leave him prey to infection.

Tansy pauses, standing back as he dips his face beneath the water. She only starts to count the seconds once she feels it had been too many moments of stillness-- then he emerges gasping, water streaming from his great pale mane and a far more even rise of breath. Relief twinges through her, and Tansy hides it with the studying eye of a medic, inspecting the cuts and puncture upon his hide.

"You are very welcome." she huffs with a warm crinkle of her eyes. She had never been one for bashfulness, and she felt his gratitude seemed genuine. "What's bothering you the most? I'm afraid I have little to dress your wounds... but I might be able to find somethin' that'll take the edge off any pain." The downsides of rogue life. A store of medicinal herbs and blooms were not at her disposal as readily as she would have liked.

"You look about ready to fall over!" Tansy fusses with now a clearer view, eyeing the red lion's unsteadiness with a dubious eye. "Come, sit on the shore. Rest your paws."

@Alexander ♔

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